I have no friends, my dad hates me, and nobody wants me and only God can save me!?

I'm an 18 year old guy. I've had enough with life. I'm totally worthless and depressed!! My dad can't afford (or so he says) to send me to a good college. So the only way I can get in is by scholarship. But I'm not good enough for a scholarship!! My grades wern't upto the level though I tried! I run long distance track but I havn't won a lot of races. I somehow came 2nd place at the 5000m qualifications for the nationals last year but I came in 9th place at the finals so no recognition for scholarship. I'm my parents only son!! My dad's telling me if I don't get into a college by scholarship, I go out of the house and work small time as a delivery man...waiter or whatever as long as I don't go back home. My mom supports me a little. Tells my dad to just dig into the savings and send me...scholarship or not but my dad just yells and asks her to shut up. I have no good friends to ask help. It seems nobody wants me. I feel so depressed these days. Each day is like another nightmare! I just want to end it all. I used to love distance running and swimming. It used to be my way out but now I've completely stopped athletics. I just live like a caged bird. I know where I can get some antidepressant pills without prescription. I've been taking them everyday and surviving. But I don't know how long I can go. Please help me before I murder myself!! don't ask me to try for loans or govt help. I really don't know how to go about and I have nothing and am nothing without my parents. If they throw me out, the only job I can get is a waiter or delivery man or something which needs high school diploma. And I don't want to be living that miserable life. I had such good dreams and theyre all gone. Please tell me what to do before I die of overdose!! I've got enough antidepressants to kill an elephant